


Baby Underoos

by Alchemist14



Category: Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: De-Aged Peter, Hurt/Comfort, Minor Injuries, Peter Parker Needs a Hug, Peter Parker is a Mess, Protective Tony Stark, Tony Stark Acting as Peter Parker's Parental Figure
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-29
Updated: 2021-01-12
Packaged: 2021-03-01 02:20:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 6,895
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23367589
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Alchemist14/pseuds/Alchemist14
Summary: Peter has been ignoring Tony's calls after one of his rounds as spider-man. It would be fine, wouldn't it?Tony is not equipped to deal with a sick kid but here they both are.Stephen didn't sign up for any of this.Here we go...
Comments: 15
Kudos: 94





	1. Chapter 1

“I’m dead. I am so dead, he’s going to kill me. I am deader than a doorbell, door nail, whatever it is that’s dead that Scrooge references in a Christmas Carol!” 

“Seriously Peter, you need to take a chill pill, sit down and relax. You’re beginning to come across a little manic” Ned teases, grabbing his pacing friend by the shoulders and pressing him down into his desk chair. 

“Don’t tell me to calm down Ned” Peter was bordering on hysterical now, raking his fingers through his brown curls and tugging gently. “What am I going to tell him? What am I going to tell May!” 

“Seriously Peter, what is your life! I mean here I am on a Monday night, sat in my room working on Maths homework I shouldn’t have left until the last minute because I don’t really understand what’s going on.” 

“What bit? I can help” 

“No, now shush I haven’t finished.” He flapped his hands at his seated friend to halt his protestations. “Although maybe later you could take a look at equation four? Anyway, I digress, where was I? Oh yes, I’m here doing my maths homework and you are swinging around Queens, in a super high tech Tony Stark made super suit, webbing up muggers and stopping bank robberies, am I missing anything? No? So why are you complaining!” 

Well used to his friends impassioned outbursts, Peter just groaned loudly, peering sheepishly up at Ned through the hands over his face. “I’m not complaining exactly it’s just, well” 

Both boys yelped in surprise as Peter’s phone began to vibrate loudly on the desk where he had set it down upon arriving. 

From his vantage point stuck to the ceiling, he would vehemently deny it if anyone asked or Ned was to tell anyone but in his surprise he had jumped so high he had hit the ceiling and stayed there, he could quite clearly see the contact picture that had flashed up on the screen. 

“I’m dead, I’m so dead, I’m dead dead dead. I just won’t answer, that’s a good solution. He won’t know I’m ignoring him, I’ll just tell him my phone was on silent, that’s not exactly a lie.” 

Ned watched Peter mutter manically to himself on the ceiling, wondering at what point in time exactly his life had become so weird. Although he wouldn’t change it for anything, he did sometimes wish Peter would involve him a little less. Seeing that his friend was not going to remove himself from his ceiling in the foreseeable future, he made his way over to the desk to check out who was calling. 

Whoever it was must really want to talk to Peter because they were very persistent, the phone still vibrating after a good fifteen minutes had passed. 

“Umm Peter” he called breathlessly, “you do know it’s Tony Stark, as in the Tony Stark that you’re ignoring!” 

“Of course I know, Ned!” Peter cried, Ned jumping out of his skin as his friend used one hand and dropped to the floor, appearing suddenly at his shoulder. “I told you he is going to kill me” 

“Peter, I am receiving a call from Mr Stark, would you like me to answer?” 

“NO! Karen, no. There’s no need to do that” Peter laughed nervously, “I’ll just call him back later” 

“Connecting with Mr Stark” Karen announced cheerfully. 

“Hey.... Mr Stark” 

“Mr Parker, care to explain to me why you have been ignoring me for the past half an hour?” Tony asked, clearly frustrated at having to chase after his young protege. 

“Uhh I’m not sure what you mean Mr Stark, I haven’t been ignoring you. I’ve been... studying, with Ned. He needed help with some Maths” 

He gestured wildly at Ned, trying to prompt him into speaking. Ned stares at him with wide eyes, Peter jerking his head meaningfully at the phone. 

“Uh hi, hi Mr Stark, Tony Stark sir” Ned was finally able to stutter out, “I, uh, I can confirm that Peter is here helping me with maths, you see equation number four is really hard and the teacher didn’t really explain quadratics very well so I just needed a little bit of help” 

“Alright Ted, thanks for the alibi but I know for a fact Pete hasn’t been at your house before the last hour so save the excuses.” 

A hologram of Tony’s face popped up from the screen and swivelled to face a mortified Peter with a judgemental raised brow. 

“So Underoos, what have you got to say for yourself?” Tony asked expectantly.

“I don’t know what you mean Mr Stark sir” 

“Okay kid if you’re going to keep on lying then we’ll just have to see how well you can pull it off to my face. Happy will be picking you up after school tomorrow so don’t be late.” 

With that, the call ended with a disturbing bloop noise and left the two boys to stare at each other in horror. 

“I’m so dead” Peter cried, flopping face first onto his bed and muffled screaming into his pillow. 

“You might want to practice your poker face Peter, I hate to break it to you but you suck at lying” 

Peter weakly raised an arm to flap his hand bonelessly in farewell as he headed home.

“See you tomorrow Peter” 

Once he swung through his window, not even bothering to summon the energy to pull off his clothes, he rolled himself under the covers like a strange slug and was asleep in a matter of minutes.

Or at least that was what he had hoped would happen. In reality, he lay awake all night staring hopelessly at the ceiling interspersed with bouts of mind numbing panic that left him gasping for air and clenching fistfuls of duvet until his muscles unlocked again. 

So to say he was exhausted was an understatement when his alarm rang the next morning. The shrill bell seemed to drill right through his head, ringing uncomfortably in his ears in its attempt to rouse him for school and he smacked his hand down onto the button with a deep sigh. 

Stumbling into the bathroom, Peter splashed his face with cold water, hoping it would take away some of the tiredness dragging at his eyelids or even put some colour into his pallid cheeks. Maybe it wasn’t so bad he thought hopefully, he’s had later nights before and been a fully functioning human the next day. But today was not going his way, he couldn’t help the disappointed whimper that slid past his lips as he finally raised his head and caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror. The bags under his eyes were so large he could have carried his belongings in them and they were a deep angry purple that no amount of borrowed concealer from Aunt May could even begin to hide.


	2. Chapter 2

The school day was a never-ending nightmare for Peter and during lunch he had only one wish, for it all to be over. Ned and MJ had tried their best to cheer him up, talking about the new 10,000 piece Lego Star Wars kit his mother had bought him the previous evening that they could build together, and MJ showing off her people in crises drawings. A collection she had added to massively after another week of stints in detention. He tried his best to pay attention to them, they were good friends and he was lucky to have them, they didn’t deserve to be ignored just because he was tired. It wasn’t working however, his eyelids kept drooping and a yawn was threatening to break through any second. He shifted on the uncomfortable lunch table bench to wake himself up, it was strange, he had never felt like this before. All of a sudden he was burning up, his blood boiling through his veins and lighting streams of fire under his skin. Skin which was beginning to go red and blotchy, he scratched somewhat desperately at the patches and his breath began to come in pants.

“Peter are you alright?” Ned asked in concern, leaning over the table to peer into his best friend’s face. “Your eyes are all strange”

Peter gave a nervous laugh, heart pounding at a mile a minute within his chest. “I’m fine, nothing the matter with me at all”

“By strange what the nerd really means is that you look like someone has been stabbing pins into your eyeballs, they’re that bloodshot. And your face resembles a sunburnt tomato” MJ scoffed from beside them, unable to completely hide her concern underneath her scathing words.

“I just didn’t get much sleep last night, I told you that earlier!” He exclaimed, just wanting them to leave him alone to slump over the table and die in peace.

A cool hand was pressed against his forehead, the icy feeling a stark relief, and he couldn’t prevent the comforted sigh that slipped from his lips.

“Jeez Peter!” MJ exclaimed loudly, drawing the attention of the students near them, “that’s not just no sleep, you’re on fire!”

“MIchelle, is there a problem?”

Their conversation had apparently not been as subtle as they had thought it was, enough so that MJ’s cry had alerted the lunch monitor to the situation, and the kindly older lady had come to investigate.

Now Rose Connors had many years of experience under her belt when it came to dealing with children. It had taken all the tricks in the book to wrangle her four boys into any sort of order, and when any of them were feeling under the weather it was impossible to get them to admit it. You would have thought they would have jumped at the opportunity to play up an illness and miss a day of school but it was quite the opposite, that was how she could always tell when they were faking it to try and get out of a test, only then would they moan and complain about a sore throat or headache. She had known Peter for many years, and he was the sweetest boy she had ever met, but he was almost too sweet, she had seen him so many times in the lunch hall drooping into his soup or sniffling pitifully. No matter how many arguments his friends threw out, he would always shoot them down and struggle through the rest of his day.

“No, no problem” was MJ’s reply, before she turned a narrow-eyed glare on Peter’s trembling form, “this stupid idiot is just on fire and refusing to admit that it’s anything serious!”

“Peter is this true?”” Rose asked softly, reaching out to gently press a cool palm to the young boy’s forehead. Internally she cursed, his temperature was way too high to be healthy, if it wasn’t over 98, she would eat her own hat and if that damned nurse didn’t call the ambulance then she would herself. “Okay, Mr Parker, let’s get you to the nurse’s office” she clasped him gently under the arm and wrapped her other around his shoulder in a supportive embrace. “And no arguments out of you, young man” she continued as Peter opened his mouth to argue pitifully.

She deposited him gently on the starch white sheets of one of the beds in the nurse’s office, rummaging in the draws for a thermometer and sticking it carefully beneath his tongue. Giving him a loving tap on the chin she ordered him to stay put for five minutes while she fetched the nurse for him.

Not ten minutes later she had given up on finding the ever elusive, lazy lady, and so she returned to Peter who in the meantime had slid down into a half lying position against the pillows. “Peter sweetie, is there someone I can call to come and get you sweetheart?”

His only response was a moaning mumble and a weak flap of his arm in the general direction of his pocket. Assuming that was all the permission she needed, she pulled out a battered and incredibly cracked smartphone from his slacks and flicked open his contact list, scrolling through to try and find one marked Mum or Dad. After failing at that, she decided her best course of action was to just look at who was the last person to call the boy and go from there, so that would be a Mr Stark, how odd she thought briefly, but it can’t be any relation to that Stark. That would be ridiculous.

Pressing call, she waited and waited, after five rings she was about to give up and try the next name on the list when a click sounded as the call connected. Before she had a chance to say anything at all, a male voice sounded from the speakers.

“Underoos, this had better be good. First you ignore me yesterday, and now you call me when you know I’m at a very important meeting.”

“Um, is this Mr Stark?” she asked hesitantly, glancing back over at the young boy on the bed.

“Yes, this is he. Who might you be, and why do you have the kid’s phone?” all of a sudden, the tone of the man on the other end of the line had shifted enormously, from slightly irritated yet fond, to icy cold and promising death in seconds.

“This is Rose Connors, I work at Midtown tech. Peter is extremely unwell and needs someone to come and pick him up, take him to the doctors. I tried to find his emergency contact in his medical records, but I couldn’t, so I just called the last contact in his phone, you.” She couldn’t quite manage to keep her tone even as she explained the situation, despite being many miles away from each other, she still felt vaguely threatened. Thankfully that explanation seemed to appease the other man.

“I will make sure that never happens again, put my number down as his emergency contact. Ring me whenever there’s a problem, I’ll be there in ten, maybe twenty minutes depending on traffic.”

With that he hung up and she stood there for a moment, mouth slightly open in consternation. While waiting, she kept herself busy, dampening cloths and bathing Peter’s forehead to keep him cool.


	3. Chapter 3

“Miss Connors, I presume” a voice asked from the doorway, startling her badly where she was sat next to the bed and she spun to face the man who had finally arrived.

“Yes, that would be me” she answered respectfully, just about managing to keep her jaw from hitting the floor, but she wouldn’t let the fact that it was _the_ Tony Stark standing in the doorway, phase her.

“What’s wrong with the kid?” he asked, striding purposefully across the room and pressing his own hand against one of Peter’s roasting pink cheeks.

“M’fine Misser Star” Peter mumbled blearily, squinting up at the older man hovering over him, “m’sorry sturbed your meeing”

“Don’t worry about it Underoos” Tony murmured softly, brushing the hair off his forehead with a gentle smile, “you really are out of it, aren’t you kiddo?”

“He has a fever of 102 degrees so I should think so!” she exclaimed, presenting the thermometer as evidence, “no matter what he tries to tell you, this boy is sick.”

“Do you think you can stand Pete?”

Peter managed to shuffle to the end of the bed, legs dangling freely from the edge. Pressing his hands flat against the mattress he pushed and hopped off with a little effort, landing squarely on his feet. For a moment it looked as though he would make it under his own power, then he wobbled dangerously, knees seconds away from giving way and he flailed his arms slightly to delay the inevitable.

“Woah there” Tony chuckled, looping an arm around the young boy’s waist and dragging Peter’s arm to loop around his neck. “That was a question, not a demand for you to prove yourself kid.”

* * *

After a smile and a signature for the sign out sheet and receptionist at the front desk, the two were outside the front of the school where Happy was leaning looking very disgruntled against the bonnet of a sleek black car.

One look at Peter’s pale face, ruddy cheeks and the hair plastered to his forehead, not to mention the way he was hanging off Tony instead of bouncing along like an overexcited puppy, and Happy knew something was very wrong. Before they even reached him, he had the backdoor held open for Tony to carefully deposit the sick teenager inside.

“So, it wasn’t just a prank call then eh.” He asked as he started the car and pulled as smoothly as he could away from the kerb.

“Kid’s running a mega fever, which is strange given that since the spider bite, he hasn’t been sick once.” He couldn’t help the deep frown on his face as he laid his palm on the boy’s forehead once again.

“So, hospital?”

“No!” Tony exclaimed, meeting Happy’s eyes in the rearview mirror. “Are you mad, we can’t take the kid anywhere near conventional medical centres, spider DNA remember. Besides I have facilities in the tower that are as good as, nay better, than any hospital Happy my dear pal.”

Happy agreed with a short, sharp nod, “You’re the boss.” And without much further ado, turned the car sharply to the left, speeding down the highway to exit fourteen and flooring it to the tower.

“Geez Happy” Tony scolded as Peter’s, granted minimal bodyweight was flung into him suddenly as they rounded a bend at speed “where’s the fire? What secret organisation is tailing us this time, hey? Be careful of the kid!”

“Well I thought you would have been pleased that I was trying to get us home as soon as is physically possible, but i'll slow down if that’s what you want?”

“Don’t get smart with me Hap, just take it easy and get us to the Tower.”

* * *

Barely ten minutes later, and the three of them had glided smoothly into the underground car park and screeched to a halt before the shining silver of the lift doors. Happy didn’t even bother to pull into a proper parking space before cutting the engine and swinging himself bodily from the front seat, ripping open the back door.

Tony clambered out of the black leather seats, before turning and helping Peter to slide out after him. This time however, his wobbly legs weren’t even able to support him for a few meagre seconds and he just hung limply, Tony’s arms under his armpits the only thing keeping him upright. With a fondly exasperated sigh, the elder man with a strength belying his small stature, swept the young boy up and into his arms, sweaty head coming to rest heavily upon his collarbone.

Hefting his burden, he stepped into the lift and was greeted cheerfully by a mellow British voice echoing from where one could be forgiven from thinking was the ceiling. “Welcome back Sir, I was not expecting you home so early today, did you have a good meeting?”

“Hey Jarv, I wasn’t expecting to be here either, but the kids not well. Get Bruce to the med bay asap and have Dr Cho on the line just in case.” Tony sighed.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What could be wrong with Peter?

The lift soared its way upwards past hundreds of floors on its journey to the med bay, usually it seemed to pass in the blink of an eye when he was trying to arrive as late as possible to a boring partners meeting. Now it seemed to take an eternity and with every second that passed Peter’s temperature was climbing, he could almost imagine he was cradling a hot mug of coffee against himself rather than his kid’s sweaty head. He viciously pushed down the panic that was rising like bile in the back of his throat, pulling his familiar fearless Tony Stark persona to the front to stave off the panic attack blurring the edges of his vision.

Finally after what seemed like an age, the obnoxious ding that signalled their arrival to the med bay floor rang out through the small box, drawing a whimper from Peter and a mental note to disable that feature from Tony, or at least replace it with a more pleasant noise, perhaps a cricket, he’d always liked crickets.

Gently shushing the sick boy in his arms, Tony swept from the lift calling for Helen and Bruce as he did so, cursing himself for building such cavernous and extravagant buildings, when he had an emergency he didn’t need the extra stress of having to walk half a mile to reach a bed.

“Tony” Bruce exclaimed as he watched his friend come rushing in, hurrying over himself to pull back the blankets on a bed and fluff up the pillows, dragging a heart monitor with him. “Lay him down here, what’s happening?”

“Kid was dodging my calls and then I get a call from the school nurse telling me he was burning up and needed someone to come get him, and his aunt was busy. She wasn’t lying either Brucie, kid’s like a mini radiator over here.”

Grabbing an ear thermometer, Bruce quickly checked Peter’s temperature, pressing the back of his hand to his forehead at the same time and hissing through his teeth in displeasure at the heat. When the machine gave a sharp beep he glanced at the display and cursed sharply, “Cho get me a saline IV, ice and towels stat,” he barked out, working to strip Peter of his damp sweaty clothing.

“Hey what’s going on? Bruce, what’s happening?”

Tony couldn’t prevent his panicked demands for answers as the boy he saw as his kid was poked and prodded with needles, an IV line installed in the crook of his right elbow, a plastic oxygen mask strapped to his face and ice wrapped in towels tucked into various spots around his body.

“His temperature is too high Tony, 40 degrees, if we don’t get it down and fast, then he’s at serious risk of brain damage.” At the look of sheer panic and the grey tinge of his friend’s face, Bruce was quick to reassure him “we’re doing absolutely everything that we can, Peter is a strong young man, he’ll pull through this.” He clapped a hand on Tony’s shoulder and gave it a comforting squeeze before turning back to his young patient.

Tony sank shakily into one of the hard-backed chairs lining the room, clenching his trembling hands together before him he propped his elbows upon his knees and rested his forehead against his hands. Closing his eyes he begged anyone who was listening for his boy to make it through this. He sank into a haze, the only noise registering the steady ticking of the wall clock telling him that time was passing and this was indeed reality.

“Tones, Tony” Bruce called, shaking his friend by the shoulder until unfocused hazel eyes belatedly met his own. “He’s stable now, we’ve managed to get his temperature down to a more normal elevated level and we’re running tests now to try and find out just what caused this. We’ve got him on a drip to keep his fluids up and just in case we have left him with the oxygen mask, give his body as much help as we can while it fights off whatever is causing this. But you can go and sit with him now if you want to.”

He’d barely even finished his sentence when Tony had rocketed to his feet and was striding down to the private room they had wheeled Peter into, and froze in the doorway like a statue. Looking at him, you wouldn’t have thought that just the evening before the child had been swinging around Queens getting into all sorts of trouble. Usually tan skin was now a sickly washed out shade of pale and glistened with an unhealthy sheen of sweat. The bags under his eyes rivalled Tony’s own after a three day shutdown invention binge, and the mask on his face highlighted his laboured breathing. What made his heart clench in his chest and tears well in his eyes was how small his kid looked in that bed, he knew Peter was a skinny kid, the spider bite might have given him super strength but it didn’t affect his body, but with the blankets draped over him and his feet not even nearly reaching the base board, you would be forgiven for thinking he wasn’t over ten.

“Tony.” Bruce began from where he leant against the doorjamb.

“I’m staying” he murmured in response, not tearing his eyes from the unconscious form of Peter for one second.

“Tony I really think –“

“I SAID… I’m staying.” Tony almost shouted, gripping Peter’s hand tightly and settling himself firmly in the chair at his bedside. “I’m not leaving him alone here, alright.”

“Alright, Helen and I will be upstairs if you need us, just let Jarvis know. And try to get some sleep Tony, you won’t be any good to him if you’re on the verge of collapse yourself.”

He flipped the lights off, leaving the room bathed in a soothing orange glow from the standard lamp in the corner and the strip light above the bed, the only sound the muted beep and click from the oxygen machine in the corner and his own breathing.

* * *

Tony must have fallen asleep at some point because the next thing he was aware of was sunlight streaming through the window and bathing his cheek in its warm glow. Cracking his eyes open slowly, he squinted in confusion, normally it would take nothing short of an explosion to wake him once he fell asleep naturally. At some point during the night he had turned to his right and was facing the wall away from Peter, but he couldn’t quite understand why there was no evidence of Peter being under the blankets.

A soft snuffling sound and a quiet whimper pulled his attention to the left and his mind blanked at the sight before him. Slipping his stark phone out of his breast pocket, he pressed Bruce’s contact with his thumb and numbly raised it to his ear.

  
“Brucie, I think we’re going to need you down in the med bay” he paused to take another glance at Peter, “no he’s fine relatively speaking, but we have a whole new problem going on down here that need’s your attention. You’ll see when you get here. Oh, and Bruce, bring a clean blanket or something. I’ll explain later, now hurry!”

His phone dropped to the bed with a muffled thump as he turned back to Peter. Somehow over the course of the night while he was sleeping, his kid had regressed back to a toddler, his best guess put him at between two and three years of age. Carefully he unravelled the elasticated band of the oxygen mask from where it had become tangled in his brown curls and scooped the small boy up to cradle him on his hip.

“Tony what on earth were you going on about, did you have a strange dream or some… thing?” Bruce trailed off as the other man turned to face him and he caught sight of Peter in his arms.

  
Where he had expected to see a lanky boy of sixteen, he instead saw empty trouser legs and shirt sleeves dangling freely. In the billionaire’s arms there was a chubby toddler, with rounded flushed cheeks and familiar brown hair.

“Tony, what the hell!”

“I don’t know I swear! I just woke up and he was like this!”

The two men immediately stopped arguing when Peter blinked and opened his eyes with a low moan, already beginning to sob softly at the raised voices. Upon noticing who was holding him he let out an excited squeal of “Ony!” and wrapped tiny arms around his neck in a tight hug.

“Well at least he seems to remember you, I wonder how much of his adult memories he’s retained?” Bruce mumbled to himself, tapping a finger against his lip in thought.

“Seriously Bruce, seriously!” Tony exclaimed, patting a hand absent-mindedly against the toddler’s back as he spoke, “that’s what you’re focussing on here! He’s a toddler, an actual bloody toddler! Not the sixteen year old teenager who was extremely ill that was here last night, and is meant to be here now!”

“How exactly it happened I’m not entirely sure, we’ll need to run many more tests for that, but he seems to be fine now, other than the whole being a toddler thing.”

“You’re enjoying this aren’t you” Tony accused with narrowed eyes.

“Just a little” Bruce chuckled, “in all seriousness, a toddler suits you. Look, while we try to figure out what’s going on with Peter, why don’t you take him to get some clothes that actually fit him, and any other essentials he might need. Who knows how long this might last, and the poor kid deserves to be comfortable.”

“You’re right” Tony acknowledged, cupping Peter’s head in one strong hand and stroking his temple with his thumb while he smiled down at him, “I’ll call Rhodey, I am so not doing this alone.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not quite sure how I feel about this chapter, but I hope you enjoy it :D   
> Any comments or suggestions are welcome, let me know where you think this should go next when Tony goes shopping for baby clothes.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And it's time for Rhodey.

If you asked Colonel James Rhodes about his best friend Tony Stark, you’d very rarely get any response other than “he’s a great man,” and, “that Tony Stark eh.” For if there was anything the military man understood, it was the intrinsically private nature of Tony’s true personality beneath the public persona, and so he would never speak of anything without his explicit permission to do so.

If you were privileged enough to be within his inner circle of friends or at least with a high enough security clearance, you would hear Rhodes speaking about Tony with a hint of warm pride in his voice, tempered often by a note of fond frustration at his most recent antic. The two had met at university when the much younger billionaire heir had been assigned to him as a roommate, and his damned soft heart had immediately become attached to the gangly, out of place kid who was suddenly a fixture in his life. It wasn’t even a difficult process, taking the other boy under his wing had been as natural as breathing, the kid was bubbly and snarky, enjoying a good time, and yet could be polite and charming when it suited him. His mom had been taken by Tony from the first moment she met him, and he smiled his bright, dimpled grin while kissing the back of her hand, he had an open-ended invitation to the Rhodes household whenever he wanted it.

What really cemented Tony’s place as his brother, however, was the sensitive side that he only rarely allowed to the surface in the privacy of their dorm room. One evening when Rhodey had called it a night quite early to do some revision for a maths exam that he really didn’t want to fail, he had pushed the door to their shared room open to find the younger boy curled up in the cramped space beneath the bed, sobbing soundlessly. It had taken him almost an hour to coax him out, and another besides for him to cry himself out leaning against Rhodey’s shoulder. In the comforting silence of the middle of the night they shared their life stories, their deepest secrets and innermost thoughts, and Tony unburdened himself of the unholy pressures of the Stark family name.

And, as they say, the rest is history.

Now over the years, they both had grown into men who enjoyed a good time, who liked a lavish party and to indulge in alcohol, Tony more so. It was not unusual to find one or the other of them passed out on the nearest available flat surface in various states of undress, nor to receive a call from the other when they were two sheets to the wind, asking for the other to bail them out of trouble or come drive them home.

So it wasn’t exactly unusual for him to receive a call from Tony at just past midday on a Tuesday, but ever since taking up the mantle of Iron Man, and more particularly since he took Spiderman under his wing, he had gotten a handle on his drinking and binges and hadn’t needed his help for quite a few years.   
  


It was therefore with a ball of concern sitting heavy in his gut that Rhodey answered the familiar tones of Back in Black blaring from his phone, well-practiced taunt on the tip of his tongue as he greeted his old friend.

“What’s up Tones? Got your ass in a spot of bother and need me to sort it out again?” he jibed, clamping the phone between his ear and shoulder while he leant down to tug his boots on.

“Not my ass this time honey bear, but you’ve got the right idea. We’re having a spot of bother with the kid right now, and I could really use my bestie for moral support.”

Even through the slightly sketchy phone line, Rhodey could hear the exhaustion in Tony’s hoarse voice and could almost see him scraping a hand across his facial hair as he spoke, tucked into the nearest corner for privacy.

“Is Peter okay?” Rhodey asked, he had only met the teenager once or twice, but the kid had such an infectious smile and his stammering hero worship was quite frankly adorable. Both times he had peppered him with questions about the War Machine suit and how his day had been, and the thousand-watt grin he had received when he presented him with a Lego set had made his decision for him. Peter was officially his honorary nephew, and he was counting down the days until their newly scheduled movie night, where he was going to introduce the kid to the masterpiece that was the Back to the Future trilogy and then thrash him at Trivial Pursuit, so it was concerning that the kid was in trouble. Then the second half of Tony’s sentence filtered through and a frown took over his face, “now you only ask for my moral support in very certain circumstances, and I’m really not in the mood for shopping right now!”

“It’s shopping for the kid! And you know I wouldn’t ask you to do the very thing you hate if I didn’t really need your help.”

“Fine, fine. But you owe me big time for this, and I’m talking ice cream sundae big Tones.”

“Thank you Rhodey, see you in twenty.”

The sheer relief in Tony’s exhalation was enough to tell him that he’d made the right decision in choosing to acquiesce to his friend’s demands, and to forgive him for hanging up on him. Luckily he had been stumbling around the house while on the phone, narrowly avoiding toppling over every single piece of furniture he owned trying to pull on his jacket, so to leave the house all he needed to do was grab his car keys and pull the door shut behind him to be on his way, otherwise he would never meet Tony’s twenty minute time limit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not much going on here but I felt we needed a chapter to introduce Rhodey!   
> Hope you liked it, drop me a comment and let me know :D


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And Rhodey finds out.

“Tony, I’m here, you had better be ready to go because I want to get this over and done with as soon as possible! Then we can chow down on some quality Chinese food and move up next week’s movie night, I need some relaxation time!” Rhodey called as the lift doors slid open to admit him to the penthouse of Stark Tower where he was sure to find Tony slobbing out on the couch, avoiding some paperwork Pepper was desperately trying to get him to sign.

In retrospect, he really should have known that he wouldn’t be walking into a normal situation. He already knew there was some kind of issue with Peter, so Tony would be more anxious than usual and definitely have taken the day off, regardless of Pepper’s arguments to the contrary. Added to this, the man who absolutely hated shopping if it wasn’t from an online catalogue or a new sports car, was actually going to visit a physical store to buy items. He should have known that it wouldn’t have been any usual scene that greeted him, but he was in no way prepared for what it was he saw when Tony finally stepped out from the kitchen area into his line of sight.

“What the shit Tony.” Were the first words to fall from his lips.

Tony gave an exaggerated gasp and clapped a hand over the ear of the toddler, the actual freaking toddler in his arms, and shot him a mock glare.

“No naughty words when there are little ears around Rhodey, what would your mother say.”

“She’d be with me on this completely, and too busy asking where the hell you got a kid from to be scolding me for my language. You haven’t kidnapped someone’s child, have you?” Just thinking of that possibility made his head ache, and he dug a knuckle into his temple as he crossed the room to stand before the man he considered his brother.

“I am so offended on two counts!” The billionaire gave him a cheeky grin, patting the small child on the back when it made a sort of questioning hum at the sudden increase in noise around it. “One that you think I Tony Stark would a, steal a child, I would so be able to make someone part with their child if I asked nicely or wrote them a large enough check. And b” he held up two fingers, “that you haven’t recognised said child that we are currently arguing about.”

“Recognised? Tony, I don’t know any kids under the age of sixteen, and I only know one sixteen-year old, so that’s not really saying much.”

“And five, four, three, two” with each number Tony folded down the corresponding finger, foregoing the one in favour of pointing meaningfully at his best friend’s face. It was with high levels of satisfaction and amusement that he allowed a massive grin to spread across his face as dawning realisation filled Rhodey’s.

“Wha… but, no… no… how… what… do I even want to know!” he stammered, eyes shooting from the familiar head of curly brown hair in Tony’s arms to the smirking face of his best friend that he dearly wished he could give a firm smack to. “Why is Peter a toddler, HOW is Peter a toddler!”

“I have to admit I don’t actually know the answer to that question, Brucie is running the simulations as we speak but until we have the results we are stuck with this little terror.”

Tony bounced the toddler in his arms to illustrate his point and drew a delighted peal of laughter from the child who squealed “’gain, ‘gain ‘Ony!”

The billionaire seemed only too happy to indulge the boy, jiggling him up and down gently while pulling the silliest faces he could muster to make him laugh even harder. It was bizarre to say the least, seeing the notorious playboy acting like a fun uncle, or dare he say it a doting father when the last time he had seen Tony interacting with anyone under the age of ten in the past, it had ended with tears and vomit, a lot of vomit. Speaking of vomit, he knew he would have to step in soon or there would be a repeat of that incident.

“Umm Tones, I would suggest you stop bouncing the kid now.”

“But he likes it, don’t you Pete” Tony cooed obliviously, getting more delighted giggles and an enthusiastic nod in response, “see.”

“Yes I can see that, but I can also see that if you do that for much longer, the kid is going to puke on you.”

Just like that Tony’s grin faded and he immediately stopped bouncing Peter, his phobia of dirt, and in particular sick, enough to make him listen no questions asked.

“’Ony why stop?” Peter asked, tugging on the collar of his shirt with a pout.

“Sorry Petey but we don’t want you getting sick.”

  
“Okay ‘Ony,” Peter agreed quite easily, but it was with no small amount of sniffling that he laid his head on Tony’s shoulder and peered out at Rhodey, small face pink with exertion.

“Right putting aside” he made a big circle with his hands to encompass Tony and his toddler, “all _this_ , I take it the urgent need to go shopping is to get some clothes that will fit the actual child that you are now in possession of?”

“You always were a smart one Rhodey.” Tony teased as he faffed around, sliding a pair of sunglasses onto his nose with great difficulty with one hand, and shoving his car keys and mobile into too tight trouser pockets. “So, my ever so astute friend, who is blessed with nieces and nephews for whom he occasionally buys birthday gifts for personally, what shops would you recommend for this little thing?”

“I have a few places in mind, but brace yourself, it’s going to be a long afternoon and you are forbidden from uttering a single complaint!” Rhodey warned.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, shopping will be on the agenda for the next chapter!  
> Hope you enjoy this chapter, please let me know :D

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you enjoy, I will be continuing this when I can. Please review and let me know what you think :D


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